Pastor Roselyn Oduyem [I’m not fashionable]

Oduyemi

Pastor Roselyn Oduyemi is the widow of late Apostle Gabriel Oduyemi, founder, Bethel Ministries. She reveals how she manages the ministry since his demise

Your late husband had a large congregation and was a popular pastor. Kindly shed light on his life as a husband and father?

He died about eight years. People say all sorts of wonderful things about him but I tell them that the greatest is the fact that he was a wonderful husband and an amazing father. He loved me and always told me so.

Why did you have to wait until he died before you started playing a role in the ministry?

He was a very confident man and allowed me to grow and prosper. God used him to bring out the good things in me. Love does many things and is capable of changing people. He allowed me to flow with him in ministry. The first three years of ministry, God used me to start the church. Afterwards, God asked me to step back and let him (Oduyemi) run with it after he had an encounter with the Lord. But then, he respected me as a woman of God till the day he died. He allowed me to preach and flow in my gifting. So, it was not a question of him not letting me do anything.

Was it difficult fitting into his shoes?

We were together for 25 years. He knew he was dying and he tried to prepare me. God just gave me my own pair of shoes to wear. I don’t suffer from corns and the shoes are not too big either. They just fit and it was just a question of continuing with the work.

How have you coped with widowhood?

First, I made up my mind that I would never be an object of ridicule or pity. Going through the scriptures, you will find that widowhood is not pleasant. I made up my mind to depend on God. I have never seen myself as a widow. I see myself as a complete human being in Christ. It just happened that my husband went home to be with the Lord but my life did not end. In fact, it was just a new beginning. Yes, it was a great loss but if I had stayed on that lane, I would have been buried alive. God opened a door for me and I had two choices. The first was to stay back, cry, lament and question God. The second choice was to walk through the door with courage. I chose the latter but I won’t say the journey has been easy. I have children and other issues like school fees, domestic affairs and church administration to deal with. But God has surrounded me with an incredible team who loves me.

Do you miss him?

Of course I do. I miss everything about him. There are times I would get to the house and want to talk to him and then remember he is no longer there. He was a very wise man and I trusted him.  He listened to me but there were times we quarrelled. I will honour his memory forever.

What kind of childhood did you have?

I was born in Cameroon of a Christian and very strict family. I grew up there and my family believed in education and character. It was all about being content with what you have and the basic Christian virtues were enforced. I studied English at the University of Yaoundé, did a masters in Cameroon and another masters at the University of Lagos. Then, I went to the School of Media, Pan African University. I did a certificate course in media and now I am doing something on leadership at the Institute of National Transformation. I believe in education and reinventing yourself.

As a grandmother, when were you born?

I am not scared of telling my age but people have this crazy notion that when you are my age, which I won’t tell, then you should be old. I have spoken to people who are 30 and they feel old. I have an uncle who is 95 and he travels all over the world. He even started his ranch at the age of 93. He is well educated, studied at Cambridge. He was appointed a senator at 95. I come from a lineage where age does not matter.

What was the attraction when you met him?

It was not love at first sight but he was a gentleman. He was a decent human being and treated me right. Initially we became friends but I began to see him as a big brother. He did not try to take advantage of me. He just protected me.

Was that why you married a pastor?

I did not decide to get married to a man of God. My husband and I met by divine appointment. I came to Nigeria to do my masters in 1979 and we got married in 1984. On October 18, 1984, a word came that we should start a church. That was how the church started by faith. It was our wedding day. We were both very young Christians and leaving business to go into ministry was a case of decision.

Did you raise any objections about starting a ministry?

He was the one who objected. God did the convincing. It was not because he did not love God, he just did not want to be a pastor.

What were some of the challenges when the ministry was newly founded?

The first seven years were challenging. We had a church under a canopy because the church literally started in our living room. From the dining section, we moved to the living room and then we moved outside. I want to believe that we were the first Pentecostal church in Victoria Island. The residents did not want any church in their vicinity and they told us point blank that church is not for rich people. They said we could go to Ajegunle or Mushin to have church .The military were sent to dislodge us and there were times we saw fetish objects but we lived there and nobody could evict us. You have to understand that when God starts something, nobody can stop it.

Is it deliberate that you have not remarried?

It is not deliberate. You don’t get married for the sake of marriage. It has to do with purpose and destiny. I have not found any guy yet.

Are you saying you might remarry?

It is not that easy because I am a very independent woman and I have not met any man who challenges me. When it comes to marriage, men always prefer younger women. A lot of men don’t have the courage to want women who are older or have been liberated by the word of God.

Do you have time for leisure?

I am a very private person. My life is very simple and quiet. I don’t go out much and I create time for myself. I have to create time with God; I have to be in His presence. When I am with Him, it is enough. I have learnt to enjoy my time with God.

In what ways do you give back to the society?

There are so many people with so many problems and each of us has a duty to help wherever we can. Bethel Ministry is working with widows, the unemployed, street children and we have a department of benevolence where, every month, we give away food. We like to inspire people and tell them life could be better than what they are experiencing.

What does style mean to you?

I am not a fashionable person. I think style is understanding your body as a woman and wearing the things including colours that suit you. The styles I wear are not complicated. I wear clothes that suit my body and I believe in being very comfortable.